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-   -   Food and Drink so,i got a ****in skunk invading my property (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=299671)

seclark 05-02-2016 05:43 PM

so,i got a ****in skunk invading my property
 
bastard shows up about a week ago, coming out of the southwest corner of the yard...right about where the septic tank is(imagine that). it's just taking a couple steps at a time, nose on the ground. i hollered to the wife, "****in skunk's in the yard". she didn't make a big deal out of it, so, wth?

so, i'm sitting on the shitter this morning, scanning through the newest arrival of the "smithsonian", and she yells out, "have you got your gun?" turns out the damn skunk is back in the yard, digging up grubs.

i walk out on the back patio and yell, "yo skunk!!! get the **** out of here!". didn't even act like it heard me. kept digging and shit.

so i went back inside, got dressed and went to work.

i don't think this is over. i mean, i've shot a few critters over the years, but i ain't gonna shoot a skunk in the yard. read somewhere that if you shot them in the head, they wouldn't spray. but i don't think i'm that good of a shot. so, someone's gonna have to clean up a helluva mess. plus the smell for a few days.

i don't think you can trap a skunk...i know i wouldn't.

advice?
tia
sec

Eleazar 05-02-2016 05:44 PM

http://www.floridamovielocations2.or...wpfdfaee84.png

O.city 05-02-2016 05:45 PM

You can trap a skunk. Don't do it, but you can.


Ask me how I know this

big nasty kcnut 05-02-2016 05:48 PM

Ok O. city how you know that? Also se clark you need a pellet gun!

seclark 05-02-2016 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O.city (Post 12212563)
You can trap a skunk. Don't do it, but you can.


Ask me how I know this

i'll ask, but i think i already know.

also, waiting for smellypits/dobiegillis to chime in saying that the only reason skunks smell is because of the media and government feeding us jacked up info.
sec

seclark 05-02-2016 05:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by big nasty kcnut (Post 12212565)
Ok O. city how you know that? Also se clark you need a pellet gun!

you don't want to piss off a skunk, nut!
sec

O.city 05-02-2016 06:00 PM

Something kept getting in my grandparents trash so my cousin and I thought we'd trap it.

Once we went to check the trap it was night and dark. We saw something black in there, thought it was my Grammys cat. Reach in, grab it, pull it up to our faces to see which cat it is.

At that moment, we realize it isn't a cat.

Dave Lane 05-02-2016 06:01 PM

Chocolate bars. Trust me. Even shooting at them failed.

And chocolate flavored X-lax. Seriously.

Hog's Gone Fishin 05-02-2016 06:01 PM

Trap him in a live trap. After he's trapped throw a towel over the trap so he doesn't know whats up . then you can transport him wherever in the WIFE's car.

O.city 05-02-2016 06:02 PM

We got sprayed a little not horribly but enough for some vomiting to occur.

Once we got cleaned up, we took the skunk in the trap and put it in the trunk of one of my buddies car.

Fish 05-02-2016 06:02 PM

First you'll need to train a monkey to use a paint ball gun...

eDave 05-02-2016 06:02 PM

Start throwing dead mice in your neighbors yard. Let him handle it.

eDave 05-02-2016 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 12212587)
Trap him in a live trap. After he's trapped throw a towel over the trap so he doesn't know whats up . then you can transport him wherever in the WIFE's car.

Better advice. I'd do this.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dave Lane (Post 12212586)
Chocolate bars. Trust me. Even shooting at them failed.

And chocolate flavored X-lax. Seriously.

serious? will chocolate/x-lax put them down? will they just lay down dead, or do some kind of floppy chicken thing? i don't want them spraying.
sec

O.city 05-02-2016 06:04 PM

Just shoot them though

seclark 05-02-2016 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212591)
Start throwing dead mice in your neighbors yard. Let him handle it.

no neighbors.
boonies
sec

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O.city (Post 12212563)
You can trap a skunk. Don't do it, but you can.


Ask me how I know this

I've trapped quite a few.

Tie a long rope to the trap, throw a tarp over it and drag it somewhere you can shoot it without having to smell it.

Neighbor let one die from heat once and it didn't spray either, and only took a couple hours.

eDave 05-02-2016 06:07 PM

HOW TO KEEP SKUNKS AWAY: SMART TIPS AND METHODS TO REMOVE SMELLY CREATURES

http://pestkill.org/rodents/skunks/how-to-get-rid-of/

eDave 05-02-2016 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark (Post 12212597)
no neighbors.
boonies
sec

Move out of the boonies. :D

Hog's Gone Fishin 05-02-2016 06:08 PM

I had a skunk in my attic at the farm. Had no idea until at 2 oclock in the morning I heard him screaming and he sprayed. I'm thinking there was a bullsnake up there that got him in a bind. Pulling bed sheets up over your nose does nothing to cut off the smell. My eyes were burning.

stumppy 05-02-2016 06:08 PM

If it's nesting there then load up its burrow with mothballs, if it's just looking for food the leave out some chocolate exlax.

O.city 05-02-2016 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212599)
I've trapped quite a few.

Tie a long rope to the trap, throw a tarp over it and drag it somewhere you can shoot it without having to smell it.

Neighbor let one die from heat once and it didn't spray either, and only took a couple hours.

We usually just shoot them.

Last one I shot with a 7 mag. It did not spray

eDave 05-02-2016 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumppy (Post 12212608)
If it's nesting there then load up its burrow with mothballs, if it's just looking for food the leave out some chocolate exlax.

So is that because the skunk won't want to eat there anymore? So simple, so brilliant.

Sofa King 05-02-2016 06:11 PM

I'll help, trapped a shitload. get a live trap, cover all the way around with a blanket, put broken eggs in it and set it near the hole. when it springs, picked it up and carry to a large tub of water (bigger than the entire trap) and drop it in and place a brick on top. they will never spray. do not shoot it in the head, the nerves make it spray automatically everytime. aim and inch down, and an inch back of the front leg to get the lungs and it wont spray. trapping and drowning is easier though.

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sofa King (Post 12212615)
I'll help, trapped a shitload. get a live trap, cover all the way around with a blanket, put broken eggs in it and set it near the hole. when it springs, picked it up and carry to a large tub of water (bigger than the entire trap) and drop it in and place a brick on top. they will never spray. do not shoot it in the head, the nerves make it spray automatically everytime. aim and inch down, and an inch back of the front leg to get the lungs and it wont spray. trapping is easier.

yep, I've taken them to the lake before too

eDave 05-02-2016 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sofa King (Post 12212615)
I'll help, trapped a shitload. get a live trap, cover all the way around with a blanket, put broken eggs in it and set it near the hole. when it springs, picked it up and carry to a large tub of water (bigger than the entire trap) and drop it in and place a brick on top. they will never spray. do not shoot it in the head, the nerves make it spray automatically everytime. aim and inch down, and an inch back of the front leg to get the lungs and it wont spray. trapping is easier.

You ****ing drowned it? **** man.

Do something to keep them away. Don't kill them because they are hungry.

Grrrr.

stumppy 05-02-2016 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212614)
So is that because the skunk won't want to eat there anymore? So simple, so brilliant.

I've been told the exlax will kill it from dehydration.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:16 PM

i think maybe half you guys are ****in with me. don't like skunks.
tell me more about the ex-lax.
sec

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212617)
You ****ing drowned it? **** man.

Do something to keep them away. Don't kill them because they are hungry.

Grrrr.

Dude they are ****ing nasty. I would rather shoot them though.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212600)
HOW TO KEEP SKUNKS AWAY: SMART TIPS AND METHODS TO REMOVE SMELLY CREATURES

http://pestkill.org/rodents/skunks/how-to-get-rid-of/

this is what i'm looking for.
sec

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark (Post 12212626)
i think maybe half you guys are ****in with me. don't like skunks.
tell me more about the ex-lax.
sec

You want it to die where you know where it is. Then you can get rid of it, otherwise as it decays it will release and you will smell it for weeks...

eDave 05-02-2016 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212630)
Dude they are ****ing nasty. I would rather shoot them though.

Yet Mcnut lives.

Rain Man 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

He's just a little guy trying to make his way in the world, just like us.

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

I'm serious in this thread too.

Toby Waller 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

check out the last minute. the guy gags

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/WzZU24E_zec" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/fHGK5Uj6-hE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212635)
Yet Mcnut lives.

Who is mcnut? Lol

Rasputin 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/tomato%20juice" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1133.photobucket.com/albums/m583/pobag1/Food/tomato_juice-1920x1080_zpsc676e282.jpg" border="0" alt="tomato juice photo: tomato_juice-1920x1080_zpsc676e282.jpg"/></a>


I had to wash my dog.

The worst way to wake up is in the middle of the night with a skunk smell under your trailer house and dog barking.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212634)
You want it to die where you know where it is. Then you can get rid of it, otherwise as it decays it will release and you will smell it for weeks...

so, just shoot the stinking thing?
sec

eDave 05-02-2016 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212640)
Who is mcnut? Lol

Big Nasty McNut. It's a joke man.

stumppy 05-02-2016 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumppy (Post 12212623)
I've been told the exlax will kill it from dehydration.

It will also shit in its own nest which will make it move on to another.

eDave 05-02-2016 06:22 PM

Ex Lax sounds like it could take out ISIS.

:hmmm:

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark (Post 12212642)
so, just shoot the stinking thing?
sec

Yep. Even if it just sprays you get it for a day. If it rots its weeks. Trust me on this.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumppy (Post 12212644)
It will also shit in its own nest which will make it move on to another.

to another nest? i had a great aunt like that.
sec

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212643)
Big Nasty McNut. It's a joke man.

I know:D

eDave 05-02-2016 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212655)
I know:D

Oh. Well now it's all ****ed up. Shit.

seclark 05-02-2016 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212651)
Yep. Even if it just sprays you get it for a day. If it rots its weeks. Trust me on this.

ok...i'm leaving for joplin for a few days, anyway on thursday. we'll see how it goes.
thanks!
sec

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave (Post 12212656)
Oh. Well now it's all ****ed up. Shit.

ROFL. What imma do now?

Rain Man 05-02-2016 06:27 PM

Peaceful coexistence is the answer. The skunk doesn't want your money or your woman or even your time. It just wants to eat some bugs and enjoy a nice summer day.

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark (Post 12212661)
ok...i'm leaving for joplin for a few days, anyway on thursday. we'll see how it goes.
thanks!
sec

Ohhhhh trap it, tarp it, put it in the back of your truck, dump it in j diddy's front yard.

Laughter ensues on cp.


If he still lives there at least.

SAUTO 05-02-2016 06:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 12212664)
Peaceful coexistence is the answer. The skunk doesn't want your money or your woman or even your time. It just wants to eat some bugs and enjoy a nice summer day.

I bet you would change your tune if you encountered one by surprise in your travels. I thought the same as you pertaining to skunks (eat it if you kill it and I ain't eating skunk unless the shit goes down) until I ran up on one on a four wheeler and got sprayed years ago.

Now they die.

Toby Waller 05-02-2016 06:35 PM

Quote:

For a couple weeks I was having an issue with some critter digging under the roots of my tomato plants, but didn't know what was doing the digging till one Saturday morning when I saw a skunk waddling across the lawn from the direction of the tomato plants. I had read somewhere that if you can "double lung" a skunk (deflating it's lungs) it can't spray. I didn't know if this was true or not but I grabbed my .177 R9 loaded a CPL and "double lunged" the skunk at around 30 yards. The skunk just rolled over and didn't move, however I didn't know if that skunk was "playin' possom" so I waited 1/2 hour to make sure it was dead. During that half hour I dug a hole in the woods to dispose of the stink bomb. Well......when I got to the skunk it was indeed dead so lifting it by the front paw I carried it to the burial plot. This worked fine EXCEPT while I was carrying the skunk by the front paw it was dribblin PepeLePew bombs across the lawn. I buried the critter but whenever the breeze drifted the wrong way those PepeLePew bombs reminded me of the deed for at least a month after!

mmmm

lewdog 05-02-2016 06:37 PM

Remove it's scent glands. Have an awesome pet!

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5Ucgp-GzcE8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Buehler445 05-02-2016 06:38 PM

BE THE HELL CAREFUL!

Dad had one he chased around all winter. One day it got real brave and came in his porch to eat some baby kitties. Douched the whole porch. Dad shoed it out and blasted it. Then got to cleaning. He got to thinking he might ought to call the vet.

Vet wanted the head and sent it off. Rabid. 7 shots in the stomach for 6 weeks and $3500 for him and mom later they were immunized.

If it seems fearless. Shoot it. Call animal control or incinerate it in a hot ass tire fire. Either way, if it is acting abnormal rabies is a risk. Don't **** with it. I'm serious.

eDave 05-02-2016 06:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 12212666)
Ohhhhh trap it, tarp it, put it in the back of your truck, dump it in j diddy's front yard.

Laughter ensues on cp.


If he still lives there at least.

Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew.

stumppy 05-02-2016 06:45 PM

If you're going to live trap it then use a good sized suitcase for the trap. Lay the suitcase on its side, prop it open with a stick/release trigger, weigh down the top a bit and bait it.
After you catch the little bastard you take the suitcase to the nearest druggie / scumbag part of town and leave it along the side of the road. Park a little bit away and wait. Within 10 minutes you'll be laughing your ass off. Be sure and get the video of it.

DaneMcCloud 05-02-2016 06:51 PM

I'm a four minute drive from Hollywood Blvd. but deal with deer, coyotes and skunks on a regular basis, if not every day.

There are probably three nights a week in which I can't open the family room windows and take on the cool 60 degree air because some skunk just sprayed.

It sucks.

Sofa King 05-02-2016 06:54 PM

I'm telling you, nothing is easier than what I told you. Scent free and you can dump it anywhere. I cleaned out about 30 in town a few years ago with this method, none sprayed. Hell, when they're in the trap with the blanket I just loaded them into the back of my pickup and hauled them out to the country to put them in the tank, none sprayed. Only takes 20-30 seconds.

Bwana 05-02-2016 06:56 PM

.22 to the noggin.

ChiefsCountry 05-02-2016 06:59 PM

Shoot the bitch.

Skunks also hate citrus. Lemon and orange peels in the yard would keep them away. If you get one in a garage or somewhere. Just start spraying an Aerosol can spray.

Hog's Gone Fishin 05-02-2016 07:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 12212723)
I'm a four minute drive from Hollywood Blvd. but deal with deer, coyotes and skunks on a regular basis, if not every day.

There are probably three nights a week in which I can't open the family room windows and take on the cool 60 degree air because some skunk just sprayed.

It sucks.

Don't you know how to stop skunks from spraying ?

Toby Waller 05-02-2016 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 12212796)
Don't you know how to stop skunks from spraying ?

How?

DaneMcCloud 05-02-2016 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 12212796)
Don't you know how to stop skunks from spraying ?

I don't but I also don't know where they are or where they live.

My very uneducated guess would be that either the coyotes or my Labs scare them, therefore they spray.

In more than 13 years, I've never seen one. I just smell them.

Hog's Gone Fishin 05-02-2016 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 12212802)
I don't but I also don't know where they are or where they live.

My very uneducated guess would be that either the coyotes or my Labs scare them, therefore they spray.

In more than 13 years, I've never seen one. I just smell them.

The only proven way is to stuff a cork up their ass .

lewdog 05-02-2016 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 12212802)
I don't but I also don't know where they are or where they live.

My very uneducated guess would be that either the coyotes or my Labs scare them, therefore they spray.

In more than 13 years, I've never seen one. I just smell them.

Your kids would love a skunk. Do it.

I once knew a lady who had a mountain lion as a pet. In her house. I wouldn't recommend that though.

DaneMcCloud 05-02-2016 07:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 12212808)
The only proven way is to stuff a cork up their ass .

Perfect!

I have plenty of cork stored up in the garage and I'll just start grabbing those little ****ers and ram it up their asses using the psycho neighbor's dildo.

Piece of cake.

Dayze 05-02-2016 07:38 PM

Find a sexy black cat and paint a white stripe down its back. If it's a male skunk, he go boner crazy and pursue the cat. Hopefully the cat lures him away from your house.

Iowanian 05-02-2016 07:50 PM

If you know where it's coming into the yard, put some mayo lids full of ammonia out. I know that will run them out from a porch or barn.....ironically they hate the stink.


Live trap, blanket over top...go to work and text your boys to go get it.

stumppy 05-02-2016 07:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iowanian (Post 12212924)
If you know where it's coming into the yard, put some mayo lids full of ammonia out. I know that will run them out from a porch or barn.....ironically they hate the stink.


Live trap, blanket over top...go to work and text your boys to go get it.

Thats why mothballs in their burrow work.

Iowanian 05-02-2016 08:02 PM

You want to solve it?


Go to the feed store and buy some fly bait...mix some granules into a dish of Coke near where it came into the yard....or a bowl of marshmallows

Keep the dogs locked up and get rid of the carnage within site of the bowl in the morning.

Toby Waller 05-02-2016 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iowanian (Post 12212941)
You want to solve it?


Go to the feed store and buy some fly bait...mix some granules into a dish of Coke near where it came into the yard....or a bowl of marshmallows

Keep the dogs locked up and get rid of the carnage within site of the bowl in the morning.

Where does he get the coke from?

Bugeater 05-02-2016 08:10 PM

70 goddamn posts and NO ONE has yet mentioned putting out a bowl of ****ing antifreeze? What the hell has happened to this place?

eDave 05-02-2016 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dayze (Post 12212874)
Find a sexy black cat and paint a white stripe down its back. If it's a male skunk, he go boner crazy and pursue the cat. Hopefully the cat lures him away from your house.

That just might work

https://45.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m...1q91o1_500.gif

nychief 05-02-2016 09:17 PM

divorce her.

notorious 05-02-2016 09:18 PM

Shoot it and bury it. It will stink for a few days but it will go away.


I have killed dozens of the ****ers.

Why Not? 05-02-2016 10:31 PM

Bet that skunk and 8 of his buddies wouldn't get shutout 3 out of 4 games

Psyko Tek 05-02-2016 10:34 PM

ANTI-FREEZE?
NUKE IT FROM SPACE IT'S THE ONLY WAY?


plan a vacation...
get the double barrel out
shout it right before you leave
come back inna week and hope you killed it?

Dave Lane 05-02-2016 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark (Post 12212594)
serious? will chocolate/x-lax put them down? will they just lay down dead, or do some kind of floppy chicken thing? i don't want them spraying.
sec

Dead as a doornail.

seclark 05-03-2016 06:50 AM

it's not out there this morning. going home tonight to mow...figured i'd pick up some poison at the farm shop and place it around the border of the yard & woods. might get some tree rats too, but they're a pain in the ass.

we'll see.
thanks,
sec

Frosty 05-03-2016 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 12212723)
I'm a four minute drive from Hollywood Blvd. but deal with deer, coyotes and skunks on a regular basis, if not every day.

There are probably three nights a week in which I can't open the family room windows and take on the cool 60 degree air because some skunk just sprayed.

It sucks.

We have the same issue (except the Hollywood part). Two sides of our property is bordered by a peach orchard. The skunks love to come up our driveway to dig in the orchard (or eat the fruit that falls off the tree in the late summer). We don't have A/C so we open our windows at night to cool the house off. I am forever having to jump out of bed at 2 am to rush around and close the windows because of a skunk going by our house.

Our last Aussie loved skunks too and would get sprayed at least a couple of times a year. The tomato juice thing does no work (my folks used it to try to deskunk their Bichon Frise and ended up with a pink dog that still reeked of skunk). There is a recipe on the net that is a mix of hydrogen peroxide, Dawn dish soap and baking soda and that really works. It's what we used with our dog and would leave her pretty much skunk free (it's hard to get it off of their face). Our current Aussie hasn't tried to play with the "striped kitties" but it's probably a matter of time.

Eleazar 05-03-2016 07:52 AM

Not to sound like a pinko or anything, but what's he doing to you? Why not just leave him be?


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