*** Official Jack Shit Royals vs Bowel Movement Twins GDT 07/31/14 ***
 

In Honor of Halfcan's rant, we are the JackShits Royals and are willing to get shitty tonight with the Bowel Movement Twins. We wanted a sweep and somehow our JackShit Royals couldn't find the handle in Game 1. Game 2 was won in a real Royal JackShit fashion. Just be Royal you JackShits!

Lineups to follow. Stay Tuned for a shitty mess.
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Twins @ Royals

Preview
Probables
Lineups

Thursday, July 31, 2014
Twins @ Royals

(48-58)
(54-52)

Thursday 7/31, 8:10 PM ET at Kauffman Stadium
Radio: MIN: 96.3 K-TWIN, TIBN KC: KCSP 610, Royals Radio Network
TV: MIN: FS-N KC: FSKC

Twins 2014 stats Last 5 years vs. starter
AVG HR RBI SB AB AVG HR RBI
Santana, D, CF .315 3 21 6 - - - -
Nunez, E, SS .258 3 16 4 - - - -
Plouffe, T, 3B .238 7 45 1 - - - -
Willingham, J, DH .223 11 31 1 - - - -
Arcia, O, RF .219 7 20 1 - - - -
Colabello, C, 1B .233 6 38 0 - - - -
Parmelee, C, LF .264 4 16 0 - - - -
Fryer, E, C .143 0 1 0 - - - -
Escobar, E, 2B .268 3 21 1 - - - -

SP- Kevin Correia
2014 season
5-13, 5.14 ERA, 1.52 WHIP, 54 Ks
vs. Royals last 5 years
0-2, 5.27 ERA, 1.72 WHIP, 16 Ks

Royals 2014 stats Last 5 years vs. starter
AVG HR RBI SB AB AVG HR RBI
Dyson, J, CF .274 1 14 19 6 .167 0 0
Infante, O, 2B .268 5 49 4 14 .357 0 2
Hosmer, E, 1B .268 6 46 3 14 .286 0 2
Perez, S, C .278 12 39 1 11 .273 0 0
Gordon, A, LF .276 9 47 7 14 .214 0 2
Cain, L, RF .294 3 37 14 9 .556 0 1
Ibanez, R, DH .167 4 25 3 10 .400 0 2
Moustakas, M, 3B .194 13 41 0 11 .455 0 2
Escobar, A, SS .277 2 30 23 15 .267 0 1

SP- Yordano Ventura
2014 season
7-8, 3.63 ERA, 1.32 WHIP, 95 Ks
vs. Twins last 5 years
0-0, -.-- ERA, 0.00 WHIP, 0 Ks

In and stuff

With any luck, GMDM will choke on a burnt end burger.

Best thread title ever!! Lets "hope" for a win- it is OUR TIME!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeISe_zKNBw

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>The two big stumbling blocks to making deals today for the Royals: Other clubs wanted big-leaguers not prospects; also, money.</p>&mdash; Andy McCullough (@McCulloughStar) <a href="https://twitter.com/McCulloughStar/statuses/494977953898299392">July 31, 2014</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>You will not believe this, but a lot of other teams wanted Danny Duffy and Yordano Ventura.</p>&mdash; Andy McCullough (@McCulloughStar) <a href="https://twitter.com/McCulloughStar/statuses/494980041650872320">July 31, 2014</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

And btw, I would deal Ventura. Maybe he is one of those few freaks that can throw a ball like he does and not nuke his arm, but somehow I doubt it.

So apparently the Royals will see Sam Fuld again in Oakland on Friday. Crazy deal. He started off the season with the A's. Was DFA on April 12th. Picked up by Twins. Oakland trades for him from the Twins. Is he just going to fly with the Royals back to Oakland? I mean he's already here in KC with the Twins, and the Royals are going to Oakland tomorrow.

My concerns as well, heaters usually flame out early in their careers.

Yep, GMDM made a deal to PU some extra cash on trade deadline.

I am headed to the game so I suppose I'm in.....

:LOL:

We win tonight and we go 5-2 on the homestand. We're going to have to keep that kind of pace up for the rest of the year for a chance at the wild card.

Royals are facing some scrub with a 5+ ERA tonight.. don't expect run support tonight Yordano.

The Royals' stance on the trade deadline "we believe the the offense you've watched suck ass for 106 games, somehow will start smashing and raking and thus we win".

I mean seriously, is that the best they can do?

Lets analyze this for a second as to what exactly they are saying:

1. We believe Moose, the guy we sent down once already and planned to platoon all year suddenly can hit all pitching

2. We believe Butler, who is #2 in the league for hitting into DP's and has all of 5 HR's in 381 AB's will suddenly not suck

3. We believe Lorenzo Cain, who can't play more than 2 consecutive games, will somehow quit swinging at every slider that is low and away

4. We believe Aoki, can deliver the power one should expect from a right fielder. Okay, that one was even hard to type with a straight face

5. We believe Eric Hosmer will start hitting the ball over the wall more than the rounded up 1.5% of the time he is

And to show how much faith that they have in #2 and #3 of the 5, Butler and Aoki aren't even playing tonight. LMAO

81-81!!!!

SHIT START

Great start..

LMAo, and skinny ass, Santana just hits a leadoff jack

Hosmer would send that one all the way to 1st base on two hops!!

Welp.

Billy would top Hosmer and hit it all the way to short on a blazing one hop!

Somehow we pissed off every player with the name Santana, and they are taking it out on us.

Yeah Hud, no one expects a leadoff hitter to knock that hanging curve out of the park

I'm sure Coreia will now throw a 2- hit shutout

If 86 wins makes Moore cap like he won the World Series, then 81 games will at least be a playoff worthy jizz fest, heh?

In a smaller way, I feel like, in a small way, we won the World Series

Just got to get him on the Roger Clemen's training plan.

Ventura already in suck mode. This kid is still very raw

Ventura hS sucked dick in he month of July

Our leadoff shrimp gets a hanging curveball and looks like a fool.

Haven't been able to follow all day. Holy ****, Royals do nothing at the deadline. What a sack of shit.

Jim Jones is furiously searching for Ventura's address.

LOL

Dayton they're going to flip the switch here any second

Oh I can totally feel it. These guys are just having bad luck.

Hosmer has just had a bad string of 2000 AB's, Lew. He's almost there!

This team looks ready for a playoff run. :rolleyes:

They are gonna get hot any time now. LMAO

I'm not sure I'd say Ventura is in "suck mode" just yet.

I can see it. His swing and pitch recognition are progressing with exponential growth.

/DM

WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW lCARUS???

Oakland's going to deep dick this team hard. Balls deep.

It's Pete. Consider the source.

Can they, Rex? Can they do it? I have seen nothing from this team that indicates they can do anything.

Especially against Oakland during Suck the A's donkey dick week.

Yeah, it's, Pete, bla bla bla....

Pete has been right more than he has been wrong about these Royals, painful as it is for you to recognize

Nah we tend to beat those teams and suck against lower level competition.

I would say 106 games is a decent sample size for the season to know how this team is going to perform. I'm sick of hearing this shit about how they are gonna go on a 30-10 tear or some shit

HERE WE GO

2 more singles and we can tie the game.

We are all of 6-5 since the AS break and stuff...

LMAO

way to move the runners......

ugh

You don't believe! Just keep watching....82-80 is a winning season!

/signed DM

Almost Moose

Moose gets a curveball in the same spot as the Santana home run... fights it off foul.

Moose hits some nice foul balls doesn't he

Just got back from HS, let's go Moose!

****ing Oakland just cleaning up on trades as we watch us strand 2 runners to a suck ass pitcher

Dammit Moose, we had a chance and you got sucked into a bad pitch!

Moose struck out? Go figure.

Don't worry, it's just a pitch or two away and we will go on a monster run

Derp

:facepalm: Moose just choking left and right.

Our defense is so good we don't need offense!!

At least Moustakas plays good defense, oh wait

****ing lol Moose you goddamn shitbag!

No need to throw the ball like that. He had plenty of time and we could and should be out of the inning.

Good think Dayton banked on us playing good defense

WTF MOOSE?????????

You can't be ****ing serious. Just ****ing shit.

Damn Moose.

Alright **** this shit.

Turdbirds.

Burn this ****ing team down

Yea

Too late. We had our chance to do something, but we did nothing!

sigh :doh!:

**** this shit. Should have sold off.

We want Colon! We want Colon!

Moose suckles the cock.

Moose literally has cost us 2 runs now tonight...

Strikes out with RISP = 1 run
2 errors, one of which should have ended the inning = 1 run


Dayton Moore "Just be patient"