Okay, It's Time to Come Clean
 

This has been an extremely difficult month+ for more me. I'm not really one to share my personal life with this forum but early last month, my wife was diagnosed with cancer. I've never had to deal with this, ever. Not parents, cousins, grandparents, great aunts and uncles, etc.

Because my MIL contracted terminal cancer two years ago and has already outlived her prognosis, we chose not to tell anyone at all, until we definitely knew what we were facing. It was beyond difficult to hold it inside.

So, this issue, which is completely unrelated to this forum, began to manifest itself. I began "playfully" poking at people for their views on a QB. My unrelated feelings and anger began to take over and I felt cathartic and a release arguing over a certain QB that people that I respect and would at any other time, call friends.

I was pretty out of control in late January and without going back to read what I posted, probably completely out of control in February. I was releasing all this energy, which has been enormous, to say the least. This forum allowed me to do just that.

As most of you know, I have a 4 year old and a 6 month old. The very thought of losing my wife of 17 years was devastating. Every single question went through my mind: Do I re-marry? No. Then how do my girls grow up without not only their mother, but a mother figure? How can I raise two babies? How am I going to do this? The internal questions were almost never ending.

My wife had surgery last week and just this evening, the doctor confirmed that she was cancer-free. She'll need to have monthly checkups for 2 years, then quarterly check ups for 3 years. But it was pretty much a revelation and a new lease on life.

Anyway, my apologies to SNR, BossChief, DJ, Htis, Milkman, etc. for putting up my nonsense. As I said, it's been a release and I appreciate the fact that you guys haven't totally lost it with me.

So, with all that said, I'm back to normal. Well, at least as much as I can be after this experience.

Thanks again.

Back to normal? :)

So glad that everything worked out. That is a hell of a burden to have to carry. Can't imagine how I would have handled it.

In before **** you?

Grats; **** Cancer

Fantastic news. Glad to hear that she's cancer-free.

Go **** yourself.



















































In all seriousness, hope things stay good and she stays free of the cancer.

So, full on Geno now?

Yes?

You know you are.

I think your six month old should now be nicknamed Geno.

And I'm glad shit worked out.

For you, your wife and Geno.

It was awful.

As you know, we announced on Facebook weeks after the diagnosis and just before surgery.

Suffice to say, it was extremely difficult for me. We didn't tell our oldest, didn't tell any family and had to keep it inside. After my wife would go to sleep, I'd just seek seclusion. I wanted to scream, but couldn't.

After this, my heart is wide open to others that suffer from this terrible disease and there is no doubt that it has changed me forever.

Well, at least outside this forum. :p

kinda joking

Her name is Gia, so it's close enough.

:D

Had to take your old ass off ignore for this dammit.

Glad to hear douchebag Dane might be back to normal soon.

And glad to hear your wife is cancer free in the end.

That ****ing sucks/ed.

I can only hope & pray that shitty disease stays away. I can totally understand how that would eat someone alive by keeping it quiet. No one should have to go through that & I'm sorry you & your family had to.

My wife works in the breast care center. She's learned not to become too attached to patients which is unfortunate. :(

Being near to somebody with potentially terminal diseases changes everything, I completely agree.

I've been near a relative as Alzheimers shredded her brain. It's something that takes years to gradually erode her personality, and the emotional strength you invest just to keep your heart above water... god. I know it's a bit different because it's a mental degrading instead of a physical death, but it sure feels like death.

It's really hard to explain to somebody who's never clutched somebody's hand in a hospital bed.

You realize that you're in the final chapter. It started before you were ready. You thought you were in the middle of the arc, but it turns out that curve has been pointing much farther than you knew. Everything changes.

Thank god your family will remain whole, that's all I'll say. I hope she feels like she got a second lease on life, and that the rest of her life is a gift.

Best of wishes for your family's future. I hope she remains cancer-free!

I feel your pain.....ive got a young one too and cant imagine what you were going through. Ive just recently lost my dad and have another very close relative fighting for her life against lymphoma. Prayers going your way and so happy its gone.

LMAO

HOpe I never have to deal with it but I'm calling you if I do.

Excellent news man, I know all too well how it feels when family members are dealing with cancer and then lost the battle.

You're a good dude Dane. This type of stuff is waaay bigger than any quarterback prospect. This place has been somewhat of an escape to me at times too.

Congratulations on the current diagnosis. Im sure you were strong and in turn made her strong throughout.

What a tremendous weight lifted. Congrats.

Glad to hear she's cancer free. I've been cancer free for six years now but it still ****s with my mind. Depression and anxiety issues crept in. If your insurance will pay for it, consider some psychotherapy for both you and your wife. I'm happy for you this morning.

football is irrelevant compared to loved ones, that's exactly why we can yell like idiots about it here...it's a harmless release

having lost family to cancer, I am just very glad to hear your wife is doing alright...you both have to be strong to pull through, i wish your family continued health

tough deal and I'm glad to hear your wife pulled through, but you know Geno is a reach at #1 -- no nonsense in that, even though I'm hoping they get Geno :D

Glad to hear your wife is cancer free, Dane. We just went through this ourselves recently with our two year old grandson who received his last chemo treatment last week. Like your wife, he'll have to receive regular blood tests until we get things back to normal. As soon as he's cleared to go out in public places again, we're planning a family day to celebrate him being cancer free. Speaking from experience I completely understand the incredible weight that was just lifted from your shoulders.

Glad to hear she's doing good!

Thanks for sharing the good news. It's a terrible thing to be diagnosed with, and it does change the person and their loved ones forever. It's wonderful that you have two good outcomes in your family.

Thanks for the background and update with the good news. Stay strong and hope the wife stays cancer free. Hope you grow old together.

Congrats Dane!

Praying that the good news continues for you and your family.

Congrats. Glad to here.

Prayers,Congrats, Positive thoughts... you'll get 'em from me. Wishing for continued good health news for you and your family.

Congratulations on the positive outcome to what must have been a terrifying situation.

Congrat that wifey is cancer free and glad your ok too dane you rascal you.

Glad to hear things are looking up buddy.

**** You Dane. I am glad your wife is okay. You **** Stick.

Dude, I wanna laugh and I wanna cry.

Why do you do this to me? ROFL

Seriously, that is just unbelievable. I absolutely accept your apology and I hope you'll accept mine.

My wife's uncle was diagnosed in October with Stage 4 cancer, two tumors in his brain and 1 tumor in his lung. 2 surgeries, 4 chemo treatments, and 7 radiation treatments (1 to go!) later and the doctor says he probably bought himself 5 years. He's 71 and would have likely died sometime around now had my wife not noticed the symptoms when she did (she thought he had a small stroke, it was the tumors pushing on his brain).

I am glad that you are able to experience a miracle like that. And I'm REALLY glad that your kids get to have their mother - they're probably young enough that they'll only know what you choose to tell them.

Congrats that's great news for your family, Cancer Free!!! Personally the best words I've ever heard.

You're a gigantic douche, but a lucky one.

Not sure how I missed this on Facebook, but glad to hear a positive outcome.

Well Dane, I for one am glad this forum could provide such a release. I think we've all had moments on this forum which we are not proud of, but it keeps it lively.

As for the family situation, I am sorry to hear your wife was diagnosed with cancer but am glad to hear that she is cancer-free after surgery. I will definitely be hoping that she has a speedy recovery and remains cancer free. Cheers.

Prayers for all.

No need to apologize, dude. These are words on a football forum. Whatever anybody says about anything when it comes to football on here comes second to real life.

If you hadn't posted this thread, I'm sure everybody would have shortly thereafter forgotten about the pissing matches we've had the past few weeks. Now that we know what you and your family have been going through, it's still not that big of a deal.

Very glad to hear the surgery was a success. Cancer is a ****ing asshole, but considering who your wife lives with, it's no surprise that she's beating it :D

Prayers and best of luck, man.

Cancer Sucks so bad. What a worry with small children, a wife you love, an uncertain future.
Man, glad it is sorting itself out on a positive note.
Life is fragile shit.
Good luck

No prob, bro. I know first hand what that feels like to deal with cancer and other life threatening health issues and how it has effect your mood and emotional state. Helplessness isn't something I deal with well, either. After all, as you know, i lost an ex around 3 years ago and am raising my 8 year old with learning disabilities by myself. Sometimes, we just need to vent and let it out. Completely natural.

My step dad had the same thing a year or so ago and is on the same schedule for check ups.

Best of luck and we will keep her in our prayers.

I'm always glad to hear when someone on this board goes through a tough time and comes out the other side with a positive outcome. Happy that your family will be healthy and intact.

Some things are too big to hold in. When you try it squirts out around the seams.

Thrilled that your family has received a positive prognosis. Best of thoughts your way.

Everything else doesn't really matter.

I thought maybe you were drunk posting.

Glad the prognosis is good. My sister fought breast cancer a couple of years ago and successfully beat it. Scary stuff!

I've had an aunt, a grandmother, and a grandfather die from brain tumor, breast cancer, and Mesothelioma respectively. Sucks ass. So glad to hear the good news.

I can't tell you how happy I am too hear that. The flip side to this is what happened to my Aunt. She was diagnosed with lung cancer just before Christmas and told none of us until mid January. She went in for surgery last Thursday and died Saturday due to complications from that surgery. It was very sudden for all of us. I can't begin to explain the joy I feel knowing you and those precious babies don't have to go through that. My Aunt has grown grandchildren, little bit different of an animal versus having young kids.

Congrats on the news man,I've now lost 2 Aunts,2 Uncles and a FIL to that crap and now Mama Nzoner is battling it as well.

Congratulations, Dane.

This is absolutely fantastic news. I lost one of my favorite people in this life to cancer. It's easily the worst thing I've ever been through.

So thrilled to hear your wife is cancer free. That's amazing. So happy for you and your girls.

Great news Dane! Hopefully you never have to deal with anything like that again.
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I can't imagine having to go through that. It must have been extremely difficult. The emotions you were experiencing sounds like something most of us would have just the same. Congrats on the recovery and God bless.

Congratulations. I love hearing people beat the horrible thing that is cancer. My wife has been cancer free for 2 years now and know exactly where you're coming from. Our kids were 3 and 5 at the time and her diagnosis and chemo treatment was the most difficult thing I've ever experienced.
The future CT scans are nerve racking, but it's great to hear they got it all.

Glad to hear the surgery was successful. Good luck going forward. :thumb:

Ok thats why you would randomly talk shit to me. Good to know

damn, sorry to hear flop.

Dane,

Very good news for you, your wife, and kids....
Peace and cancer free for wife going forward.

It's cool Dane. Geno Smith works in mysterious ways.

Damn man, my apologies as well.

Glad to hear the prognosis is good and things are heading in the right direction. And while it's an odd thing to say, congratulations to your wife for fighting through it.

My thoughts are with you and your family; for all the disagreements any of us have, it's a pretty tight knit group around here and we'll certainly rally around the flag in any way we can.

This
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Don't apologize to us, apologize to Geno........ :D

Seriously, I'm glad things are doing better. Can't imagine the feeling. Hang in there.

Cancer sucks. My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer last year the day after Valentines Day. I, too, have two daughters and really feared having to raise them by myself. Fortunately, my wife is now cancer free. You know you love your wife, but a life threatening illness that the two of you go through develops a deeper, more profound love that you really didn't know was possible beforehand.

Sorry to hear man. Hopefully she kicked it for good. **** cancer.

In other news, how the hell do I always miss the Dane fireworks?

Damn man, good to hear things are looking up, but thats rough. Good Luck from here on out.


PS I could tell it seems like you were emotionally up and down about something. Anyway, good to hear things are looking up.

In our prays we will keep you.

Emphasis on the plurality of the word "moments" - with an "S".

:D

ha, I THOUGHT something felt wrong about your posting...

glad to hear that your wife kicked cancer's ass. lost my gramps (the only grandparent I really had as a kid, and was really close to) to lung cancer when I was 16 and both of my in-laws have or have had cancer (mother-in-law beat breast cancer last year and father-in-law is currently dealing with lung cancer).

Dane....I am sorry for your struggles. I have been through the same thing with my wife and it was very hard for a tough guy to deal with his emotions. Thankfully my wife just finished the 5 years you referenced and is cancer free, so there are success stories. I prayer your wife has the same result.

Great news Dane, and am very glad your wife is going to have to put up with your sorry ass for a long time. Poor gal! :D

:clap::clap::clap:

So sorry to hear that Dane, and so glad to hear that she successfully fought it. I went through this last year with my mother, and while that's nothing like the impact a spouse would have, it's given me an understanding of what you've been going through.

That's rough stuff. I think it's harder on the spouse that doesn't have cancer (or any catastrophic disease) than on the one who does. I'm glad things are looking up and I hope for the best over the next 5 years. Best of luck to you and your family.

Sorry to hear Dane but glad your wife is doing great. Cancer ****ing sucks it effects not just the person but the loved ones as well.

First of all, I'm really glad that your wife is OK.
But to say you've acted any differently than you ever have is total BS.
You just happen to disagree with people who your opinions usually fall in line with this time. Same virulence, different target.

I was wondering about you man. I will pray for your situation.

Good news Dane. I am happy all is good a will always be
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Prayers for your family.

That's good news to hear Dan'e. I know what it like losing two grandparents to cancer and glad it didn't happen to you. Prayers to your family.

That's terrible, Dane, sorry. I'm glad to hear that she is recovering. My best to you and yours.

Everything else aside, I'm glad your wife is cancer-free. Nobody should have to deal with that and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, especially with young children.

Now if you could just find a doctor to remove that perpetual dick from your ass, you might find real serenity.

Thank you all very much for the kind words, thoughts and prayers, especially those of you that have also been affected by this horrible disease.

We're very fortunate that the cancer was detected somewhat early. She had an abnormal pap in August 2011 and a follow-up test was scheduled for December 2011 but she became pregnant with our second child. She had an abnormal pap in October 2012, which was followed by another abnormal in January 2013, which is when we learned of the cancer.

Because her cervical cancer was caused by the Human Papillomavirus, there's only a 2% chance that it will return within five years. She had a radical hysterectomy but fortunately, the surgery was done laparascopically, so the healing time is much less than other methods. Since the cancer was found early and did not spread, there is no chance of it affecting her internal organs. However, the virus does still exist in her body, so there is a chance of return (and even possible breast cancer).

As a PSA, I urge everyone with daughters to have them vaccinated. The HPV virus is deadly and has been around for thousands of years. The vaccination can be given to girls beginning at age eleven and will prevent them from cervical, breast and tongue cancer. This virus was initially thought to be sexually transmitted only but recent studies say that it can be transferred via skin to skin contact. So Dads out there, take care of your girls and get them vaccinated ASAP!

Thanks again!

That's great to hear, hoping and praying the cancer stays gone.

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