Very awkward moment
 

So I'm doing an exam on a new patient a few minutes ago. She's in her late 20's. Attractive face, very sweet, a bit overweight. None of this really matters, cuz I'm happily married. Anyhow, at the end of the exam she says "how old are you"? I tell her I'm 45. I ask her why she wanted to know. She looks at me and wispers "you are sexy". Yikes!!!! My assistant of 16 years is sitting right there taking notes. I try to not make eye contact, and told her, thank you, that is very flattering. Now, she's going to be coming back for treatment and I'm going to be thinking that she thinks I'm sexy the entire time. Thought I'd share.

Oh, and no, I'm not going to gas her and PIIHB you sick ****ers.

Yeah, putting it in her butt AND THEN gassing her seems like the better alternative.

From the way you portray things, you might not need the gas.

Farthammer?

:clap: ROFL

Sounds like she wants to PIIYB.

don't ask, there will be no pics.

Pictures
 

This thread is worthless without pics

Now I got nothin'........

Doctor, Missouri Dental Board on Line one............

What's a bit overweight?

We talking normal people would tap it.....or only Hawk and ThaVirus?

I bet she has pics!

ROFL

HIPAA Violation?

He Intentionally Penetrated & Assaulted Ass

Well, that concludes this thread.

She look like this??

Well......? Are you sexy?

It will be more awkward when she realizes you're not a gynecologist

The key to success in this situation is to get your assistant interested in a threesome. Then you book an hour and whammo.

Stay above the neck and you should be fine. Or get some stirrups.

How about an MS Paint rendering?

#bragging/not bragging

#humblebrag

Sounds like you wouldn't even have to gas her. Turn in your ****ing man card!

Sounds like she needs a cavity filled.

What does "coming back for treatment" mean? You gonna fill a cavity?

like her vagina, hahahaha LOL

that is awkward, but how about this....

my girlfriend of 7.5 years is leaving me. Most the stuff in my house in hers. She's packing right now. Very Awkward when I pass her in the house.

she was the one I was going to marry too. :(

PICS!!!!

She wouldn't let me take or give me any "fun" ones. I have boring regular pics though. But, I'm a nice guy and not going to do that.

ROFL

Been down that road before. When you pass her in the house, muster up your best pirate voice and say, "Ahore there!"

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/1ytCEuuW2_A" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Wow that funny. I hope it cheering the guy up.

Start a thread about it. It will help.

comma key and s key broken eh? I hate that.

Yeah...that always ends well.....

For ****s sake. Grow a pair will ya? Don't think about the guy with the 12 inch cock she is doing disgusting unnatural things with! Move on!

Shush you. I'm trying to get the guy some help and encouragement.

Be glad that you weren't MARRIED TO THE BITCH FOR 18 ****ING YEARS!!!...

Wait....what....do go on.....

and it was perfectly natural....TO THEM!!!

Did she happen to have a dental
Appt today?

LMFAO! :D

You are sexy. Very sexy.

Why the hell so long?

beer, BBQ, video games, porn....for about 3 weeks.

then move on. **** 'er. Been there done that. Hard as shit, but it's the only way. Like my dad says, 'you can't force someone to love you'' etc.

You should obturate her canal with your master cone doctor.

She gave you 7.5 years. She got tired of waiting.

get another hot chick and start boning her on the couch so old GF has to watch as she's packing

Sorry to hear that man. What happened?

Original post was Q.

Edit: Go get a lap dance.

High and low in this thread.
Sec

Yep. One dude avoided a divorce and one dude isn't allowed to touch.

Might be the reason the hooker is hitting the streets!

I'd add a nice collection of various drugs to that mix, no psychedelics though. You might find yourself on dirt road in bum**** Oklahoma while hanging your head and arms off a shitty little bridge that crossess I-44, watching the diesel's headlights speed toward you from miles away, feeling the rush of the deisels as they fly a few feet beneath you, crying that you're going to Colorado to chase after her...

That's what'll ****ing happen if you trip balls right now...

In, but I'm not chasing after anybody.
Sec

"7.5 years" and "was."

I literally LOL'd. LMAO

I gotta get a glimpse of these warlocks

You should ask her if she'll lick your ass. If she says yes, dump your old lady ASAP!

Had I not been an emotional wreck, it would have been top 3 psychedelic experiences without a doubt.

You''ll always have that.
Sec

The question you must ask yourself is "would I have felt awkward had my assistant NOT been there ?

This is a good question.

Is she pushing a deuce? We talking t'ree hunnit? T'ree fitty?

Don't see how anyone could say "no" to this LMAO

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qE0wRYOwh6I" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

I love you guys.

*raises hand** i can see your pussy / Dayze

LOL

Have To

https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/2115491584/hA6F49F48/

well poopie .....

LMAO

jesus. lol

She's probably 5'8 and about 165. By no means a pig but a bit heavy for me. It's still good to be called sexy, albeit in a very awkward place. I don't have a pic and couldn't post one if I did but I'd guess it'd be about 50/50 in the would you thread.

ROFLROFL

Fat pig/ Omaha

When I was in New Orleans a few weeks ago, a woman on Bourbon Street said I had a nice rear end. I was flattered, but it didn't go any further because she lost her balance and fell, and then she and her friend had trouble getting her back on her feet again.

7.5 years is a common law marriage in some states. You might be able to keep half her shit :)

Yeah, because men always win in a divorce.

uh oh, hit a nerve

Did you at least give her a complimentary pearl necklace?

Big Bottom
Big Bottom
Talk about mudflaps
My baby's got 'em

No, no, I'm divorce free, so I speak just from hearsay and chuckle at the thought of any man hoping to gain in a divorce. Has it ever happened?