Welcome back, Ms. Katipan. I'll have a double.

FAX

Its a complicated story involving a blood-spattered Winnebago and a one-armed man.

Ah, that old story.

The old number 2.

And because I dress differently. And curse like a sailor moonlighting as a trucker. Add to that my endearing blunt like a sledgehammer method of relating to people and it makes for interesting interactions.

I wonder if they'd feel funny because of my slanty... Never mind. I'll be good. It's not 2 in the morning and I'm not drunk.

Actually I think I'll become a cage fighter. That seems to be the "in" thing around here.

Sounds exactly like someone that I'm married to. Must be the Pinay thing.

See ya at 2am tomorrow morning (12am for us West Coasters :p)

Where is hayzeus?

Coincidence or irony that I had the same encounter before moving?

I think I like Katipan, can we keep it?

Dated this chick in college with the almond eyes, and every jackass in the bum**** town i grew up in had to ask me if 'it' was really sideways. I told them no, adding, however, that she did taste like teriyaki chicken. Joke didn't work so well. None of them knew what the **** that was. Should've said teriyaki possum I guess.

As in, father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don't **** with me or I'll shove a lightning bolt up your ass, Zeus! You got a problem with that?

This would be funny if it weren't true.

They didn't know what chickens were?

Date night for these guys was usually roadkill stew with their cousin.

LMAO

"Have you found Jesus?"

If I were Jesus, I would be pissed at that certain segment of Christians who seem to keep losing their savior! Furthermore, I don't know why it is incumbent upon me to help them find him. Can't they just ask the the manager to make an announcement over the PA system to locate him as soon as they realize they have neglected to note his assumed presence? Maybe they should pick a new savior that stands out more or doesn't wander away.

Shouldn't "Savior Neglect" be a crime? I realize this doesn't apply to the majority of Christians who have had no problem keeping an eye on Jesus, its just the ones who feel compelled to knock on my door, or interrupt my silent contemplation while standing in some line. Maybe we could get them one of those child leashes so their savior doesn't stray off.

-HH