Originally Posted by Bufkin (Post 10853491)

If you've ever taken a shower in a gym, chances are you've showered near a gay guy. People who piss in the shower? Yeah, those are the assholes we should be discriminating.

Originally Posted by Iconic (Post 10853439)

"Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one."

Originally Posted by Fried Meat Ball! (Post 10853547)

This post is not getting enough attention. I'm not sure who this Iconic is, but this is one of the best posts I've read on CP.

Originally Posted by Fried Meat Ball! (Post 10853547)

This post is not getting enough attention. I'm not sure who this Iconic is, but this is one of the best posts I've read on CP.

Originally Posted by Prison Bitch (Post 10853497)

That's missing the point. If Long says this is no big deal but refuses to do it himself, he's a blatant hypocrite

Originally Posted by Bufkin (Post 10853573)

No he's not. I don't have a problem with people who rub feces on their upper lip, it doesn't mean I have to do it.

Originally Posted by Hootie 2.0 (Post 10853586)

pretty sure 300 lb athletic freaks aren't afraid of showering with a gay man

if anyone is really so homophobic they won't shower with a gay teammate because they are afraid of said gay teammate checking them out...that person has some serious issues that probably need to be addressed anyways

Originally Posted by Prison Bitch (Post 10853497)

That's missing the point. If Long says this is no big deal but refuses to do it himself, he's a blatant hypocrite

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts (Post 10853562)

He used quotation marks. He wasn't trying to pull a fast one.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tpa/409930561.html

Originally Posted by Donger (Post 10853592)

What did Long say, exactly?

Originally Posted by Chris Long

Dear ESPN, everyone but you is over it.

Originally Posted by loochy (Post 10853605)

He said (in a Twitter Tweet):